Before everything is conveyed, I think it must be said that the honest heart behind this blog is to spur thought and direct you towards insight that will enable you to walk well as a Christian.
By no means is this a perscriptive article that is telling you to find someone who will mentor you in the faith. But rather, it is to invite thoughtful reflection if you haven’t considered the matter before.
If you start becoming convinced through the Spirit, by the Word and in prayerful consideration, then you can pursue the necessary changes you need to make.
However, I come from a place where I have been faithfully mentored as a Christian. I have experienced the joys of being enriched by being pointed to the right resources and insights of wisdom that were invaluable in difficult life circumstances.
My hope is to write practically and thoughtfully.
Is Mentorship needed?
To quickly define the scope of mentorship, I speak of a kind where it’s 1-to-1 or a 1-to-few discipleship setting. Just as Paul was a mentor to Timothy, and Jesus was to Peter, James and John, there is the underlying tones of friendship, love, and even authority.
Christians have had an array of experiences regarding how they’ve grown. In the current generation of young people, the opportunity comes from their craving for deep and authentic relationships.
Paul writes in 1 Timothy 2:2 ‘
"And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable people who will also be qualified to teach others."
Additionally, when Jesus gives the Great Commission He directly tells us to “teach them to obey everything” He has commanded us, there is a strong case to implement mentorship in our lives, whether it’s a mentor who disciples you directly in the faith in a small group.
What does a mentorship relationship look like?
"Just as a nursing mother cares for her children, so we cared for you. Because we loved you so much, we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well."
1 Thessalonians 2:8
Paul gives us an idea of the type of ministry he had with the saints of Thessaloniki during his trip at the time. There is a clear separation between the gospel (not just the way to salvation, but probably more holistic Christian teaching too) and his life.
Having been involved in campus-based Christian work for a few years, I noticed how well a good and grounded friendship with a brother in the faith gave so much more room to speak the life of the gospel to them by understanding the particular circumstances in their life and their individual strengths and weaknesses.
It prevented it from becoming a performance-based relationship but an open platform to enjoy friendship and pursue Jesus seriously.
Of course, because of the diverse sets of ethnic and generational cultures within churches, there are many ways in which mentorship can be conducted.
But there seem to be a few aspects that the bible points to as essential in discipleship relationships. Here are a few:
Commitment – It is an emotional investment for the people involved for the relationships to continue and be ongoing. Paul calls Timothy his son in the faith which depicts the kind of commitment they had. (1 Tim 1:2)
Teaching – Done with the intention to teach and apply the Word in the mentee’s life. (2 Tim 4:16)
Care – Mentors can be a supporting and guiding figure for life’s hard circumstances. (Gal 6:2)
Vulnerability – There is mutual transparency with how life is going and sin struggles for the mentee to walk in righteousness. (James 5:16)
Generational – It is done so that mentees are equipped to make disciples in the future too. (1 Tim 2:2)
How can it be the most effective?
Intentional, Ongoing and Focused on a Few.
It’s most effective when there is mutual stewardship and pursuit of Jesus within the discipleship relationship and the process of spiritual formation and maturing happens through an ongoing relationship.
Because we only have so much emotional space for quality relationships in our lives, we must only focus on a few disciples too.
Forming great mentorship relationships can take years.
Having only understood the gospel at university after years of going to church, a part of me desired to make Jesus known to youth for who He really is and not just download all of the Bible’s knowledge and laws like I did.
I can remember desiring to preach and teach the gospel well to the youth and having closer mentoring relationships with a few to walk alongside them more closely.
Through youth nights,mid-week bible studies and sending memes, relationships were naturally built.
I didn’t go all guns blazing to make it happen, but as the need to navigate life well in unfamiliar situations comes into the conversation, it presents a natural step to catch up.
Most of all, since we are trying to make disciples of Jesus, it is key that we incorporate the Word and Prayer in the relationships we have in reactive(in response to circumstances) and proactive(intentionally seeking regardless of the circumstance) ways.
Otherwise, how would they know how to carry their walk without someone being an example to them?
Mentorship is effective when there is mutual ownership on a consistent basis centred on our spiritual disciplines.
So, is there someone you look up to in your church that you’d want to spend more time with?
On the other end, do you see potential in a younger person who is hungry for the Word and grows deeper in their faith?
Initiating conversation Sunday to Sunday to build a relationship over time often goes a long way. It can start off more gradually as you prayerfully consider what a mentorship relationship could look like. And perhaps the small conversations could turn into wider doors months or years down the line.
If you already have a level of familiarity with them, ask them to hang out and see where it goes!
Note: Given that mentees can be adolescents, parental awareness of the mentor/mentee is a must. There are churches that have boundaries in this area for a good reason. So consider these principles in light of the authority of you church and what it calls good conduct.
Praying this may lead to very fruitful Maccas runs for you all!
If you are interested to continue exploring these topics, feel free to consider reading these articles: